This letter should reach Mahatma Gandhi (translated from Harishankar Parsai’s satirical essay, written in 1977)
This letter should reach Mahatma Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi. Mahatmaji, I am not a member of Parliament, neither from the assembly and not even a Minister or a politician. None of these stigmas are attached to me. I do not even possess political inadequacies that I should be forced to hail you. I do not even need a position in the Government that I should visit your memorial. I have not even taken an oath at your memorial.
I cannot trust you now. In the month of March that has gone by, both Morarji Desai and Jagjivan Ram took oath at your memorial, Rajghat. But Jagjivan Babu lost his chance and Morarji became the Prime Minister. Finally a Gujarati supported another of his kin!
Those who took oath at Rajghat, within ten months became totally beleaguered. They started sleeping in the bathroom. I do not want to go that way as I am not interested to to put myself in a situation of misery. You can pull me down as well, who knows!
Many roads are named after you — Mahatma Gandhi Marg, Mahatma Gandhi Road. Our leaders tread on these paths every day. No one can say that they are not following your path. Everyday they walk on those roads. Some people are trying to make you immortal. On the last Diwali, the Jan Sangh government had supplied low quality candles. The packet of the candles had your picture. In that picture, you are seen saluting the RSS flag. One can see an image of Dr. Hegdewar as well. However, there was one error. But they will be perfect next time around. They will make you wear half pants and a saffron cap. You can delightfully become immortal as a RSS volunteer. In the future, whosoever’s name would be decided by the Jan Sangh will become immortal.
Do not expect anything from the Congress members. This species is getting extinct now. In the museums of the future, this relic will be kept as a fossil, to make future generations understand that this animal also existed once upon a time. The Rhinoceros has maintained its existence but alas, it cannot be said about the Congress. Morarji Desai will not do anything for you. He is on the side of the truth. He still is unable to say that Godse was a member of the RSS.
Everyone knows that when Godse was hanged, he had a saffron flag in his hand and the RSS prayer on his lips, “Namaste Sada Vatsale Matrabhoomi” (May my motherland nurture us forever). The Gandhian guide Damodaran is sacked from his job who disclosed this fact about Godse. He is not saved by your Morarji. Morarji is so much attached to his truths. His current truth is to remain the prime minister. He has to defend this truth. To defend this truth, he has to align with the RSS. Hence, he will not lie to say that Godse was from RSS. He is indeed truthful.
So, Mahatma ji, we have higher expectations from Balasaheb Devras. Whatever he does will be helpful for you. Just to share, the work has started already. The effort is on to equate Godse with Bhagat Singh. Godse had killed the person who was against the creation of a Hindu Rashtra. If Godse becomes a national hero like Bhagat Singh, what will happen on 30th January? Till recently, this date is commemorated as the day of your supreme sacrifice and it would slowly turn into a “Godse pride day”. No one will go to Raj Ghat then but yet they will remember you. Now that Godse will be hailed on 30th January, then it would be paramount to educate people about his contributions. Then it would be told that a brave hero had killed Gandhi. So you will be remembered because of Godse. Earlier Godse was remembered because of you.
You will get such benefits being killed by a great soul! When people will ask, “Who was Gandhi” and the reply would be, “the one who was killed by Godse”
There is one coincidence that is good for you. The Janata Party was formed on 30th January 1977. So, this date is the birth day for the Janata Party. Now you tell me if someone would shed tears for you, on a birth day?. This would remain the day of happiness. In the next few years, the Janata Party will totally become Jan Sangh. In that scenario 30th January will have great importance because a Braveheart killed Gandhi on that day. On this auspicious occasion, the Janata Party was born, which will facilitate creation of the Hindu Rashtra (the Hindu nation of India).
Do not take stress, Mahatma ji. Our Morarji Bhai neither takes stress nor is tense about anything. Why should he take unnecessary stress? Who should he be tensed about? He has declared, “All farmlands belongs to Lord Ram and is available for all the birds. Come, have a feast”. All the birds are having a feast and Morarji is not having any stress.
Everything else is fine! Your lathi (stick) is taken over by Charan Singh. He is following Jawaharlal Nehru with his stick. Whenever he finds him, he challenges Nehru. Whosoever supports Nehruvian policies, Charan Singh bashes them up. Recently when Chandrashekhar supported Nehru’s Industrial policy, Charan Singh left his home to beat him up with his lathi. Poor Chandraskehar ran to the police station where the cops refused to save him because the police station belongs to Charan Singh.
Do not worry about the Harijans (Dalits). We have quotas every year to kill them. This year’s quota is higher as the leaders of the Janata Party took oath at your memorial. Their Government was formed. They had to abide by the oath. Hence the quota was increased this year. There is a sense of happiness in the fact that the number of Dalits killed was more than the quota.
You should be carefree! Your glory will be protected in some way or the other.
Yours
Bhakt (Devotee)
Few screenshot of the original essay
